What can a little sister say about her big brother? So many things to say and no more time to say them. You taught me how to tie my shoes, ride a bike, TP a house. You told me that when I started to lose my teeth that if I touched the ones growing in they'd turn to gold. I avoided touching them like the plague. You were such an amazing brother. For all the wrong turns you took, the mistakes you made, you never let it get in the way of your love for your family. We were always close when we were younger, but over the past two years our relationship had really blossomed and you told me that I was your best friend. My last gift from you on Christmas was a card where you told me that I was your very best friend. I wanted you to know that you were my best friend too. I stare at my phone waiting for you to text me. Saying, "R U at work?" or "When will u be off?". You knew that I always had time for you. I was so proud of you when you admitted yourself into rehab and started to get your life together. No, that's not just it, I was always proud of you. From the day I was born you dubbed yourself my protector. From bullies to stalkers, you wanted to handle and take care of them all for me. I'm happy that my last memories of you were ones laughing and having a good time. I'm happy that the last thing I said to you was that I loved you. Our blood runs deep and the kind of connection I had with you, big brother, is irreplaceable. When we hung out we could always make each other laugh so hard that my cheeks would hurt. I'll miss that laugh, because it always made me feel at ease. You had an addictive personality, people couldn't help but like you. I can't fathom a life without you there. I can't comprehend not having you to run to when I have big news and for you to be just as excited as I am. For you to be there if the big news turns into bad news and make a joke but also have a shoulder there for me to lean on if the giggles didn't work. I know that you cherished me and I know that you knew that I cherished you. Like you would say, "At least I left a pretty corpse." You certainly lived a lot of life in 25 years, more than most people do in 55 or more. I will tell stories of you until the day I am laying on my death bed. I'll miss you so deeply, so wholly, and keep that place in my heart that's claimed as yours safe and sound. Only the good die young and the rest are left with a sour bereavement of what was or could have been.
With all the love in the universe,
Your little sis,