Hiro (hiromasaki) wrote,
Hiro
hiromasaki

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Actual aborted rant...

You know what, I'm done. I'm tired. I tried doing things my way. Living based on morals and honor and doing what's right. Being true to myself. Look what it's got me.

I'm doing alright financially, don't get me wrong, but that won't change or might even get better...

My major problem is that I care. And that creates stress. Which makes me bitchy. And no one wants to be around someone who's bitchy. Ignorance is bliss.

Doing things my own way doesn't work well, either. My ex and I got into arguments because I played FFXI my own way rather than follow everyone else's example. Dressing my own way gets me ignored (Though I will say that I keep ending up with shirts I'm not fond of but am willing to wear.) and being unique has yet to net me only two people who've looked at me either on a short-term or long-term basis and eventually expressed interest. My insistence in making a joke about EVERYTHING (Internally or verbally as the situation demands.) has been likewise recieved with mild to severe distain.

However, given that I would not be able to look myself in the mirror in the morning if I were to give up and conform and become ignorant of the world around me, I will trudge on. Twitch's Fiancee has long wanted to overhaul my wardrobe for me, and as a compromise we're going shopping tonight to re-do a good majority of my wardrobe, which will basically amount to her having veto and suggestion power. The only thing that I'm getting tonight that isn't influenced by her was a suggestion from the elf from last fall.
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